An Afternoon McGuyverism

There’s very little in this world that I love more than a good McGuyverism. Not quotes from the show, mind you. I never watched the show. I’m talking about jury-riggin’…a little good, old-fashioned Ozark ingenuity, as my Dad would have called it. I enjoy the three-toothpicks-and-a-tube-of-toothpaste type challenges and like to think I’m a good one to have on your side when creative use of the tools at hand is required.

Trixalot, my network admin, says I get a particular look in my eye before I dart off to the warehouse to grab some long forgotten piece of junk that could be used in whatever current crisis we’re facing. And he would know. In the six years we’ve worked together, he’s seen me tackle many of these types of problems.

When moving into our current office, Trixalot and I were charged with crafting a new home for our servers. I got five six-and-a-half-foot tall, enclosed server racks at a storage locker auction for $25 total and then set about trying to figure out the cooling. This involved ducting the air from a window AC unit across the room into the case using cardboard, duct tape, and dryer vent hose. It was a monstrosity to behold, but from it we were able to learn the best placement for an AC unit to vent into the server rack. Plus it was a load of fun to make.

And today I got to have just a bit of McGuyver fun.

We’ve been having trouble with our AC here at work lately. Out came Mike, the HVAC guy, to climb on our roof and inspect each of our four rooftop units. About ten minutes later, one of my upstairs co-workers rushed into my downstairs office with a tale of “water everywhere.” Now, I know how these things tend to get exaggerated, so I calmly asked where and how much. She merely responded, “it’s coming from the ceiling…it’s everywhere!” before zipping back out in a panic.

I walked up the stairs and was actually surprised how much of a mess there was. Certainly not “water everywhere” but there was a pretty steady stream dripping and spraying from a return air vent. Tiny trash cans from various desks had been collected and strewn haphazardly in the general vicinity of the spray, but there was no way to really catch everything because it was dripping randomly from about a four by four area and splattering through the vent screen.

I ran outside and shot up the HVAC guy’s ladder and let him know what was happening. He sort of nodded said, “Yup…that would be happening. AC was frozen up and it’s defrosting. I’d say get some trash cans.”

“How much ice are we talking about?” I asked.

He gestured into the belly of the unit and I squatted for a better angle. A huge block of ice filled the six-foot long enclosure. I sighed and returned to the seen of the mess, grabbing Trixalot from his server room office as I went. We removed the ceiling tiles first to keep them from getting too damaged. Then we took the screen off the vent, hoping to mitigate the splash/spray effect. But neither really changed the amount of splatter hitting the carpet. And then I’m told I got that particular look in my eye.

I rushed to the warehouse with Trixalot in tow. Tucked away on a high shelf, forgotten since the days of our eBay drop-off service, was a dispenser once used for foam packing peanuts. A large, roughly funnel shaped device, I was hopeful we could use it to channel the water into one central can. Add in some string to attach it to the rafters and suddenly, we had a salvaged floor.

I tell this story not because it was the most clever thing I’ve ever done, nor even a particularly difficult jury-rig. Rather, it’s just that being ripped away from writing an instruction manual to our store managers on procedures for reporting and deleting trade lines from our customers’ credit reports to manically construct an impromptu water catcher made me smile. As I write this, my dress slacks are dirty from dust and mucky water. I probably stink just a little from sprinting up and down ladders in a dress shirt not designed for breathability in an office with defective AC. And I’m only now, at 3 sitting down to eat my lunch. But, I’m smiling anyway. Because there’s very little in this world that I love more than a good McGuyverism.