There's A Real Baby In There

Our pre-birth child had its first photo session yesterday. I had been aware of the child’s presence only as an abstract parasite behind my wife’s growing belly. Sure, we’ve named the parasite Pumkin and have begun talking to it, but it remains the task of our imaginations to ad any sort of humanity to the round stomach. My wife, Moonshot, has recently become acquainted with Pumkin as not only a growing bulge, but also as a kick-boxer and part time acrobat. Moonshot will occasionally announce Pumkin’s performance and I will quickly try to feel for any sign of the gymnastics going on inside my wife…but the second I place my hand there, Pumkin stops. I doubt I could feel the motion anyway this early, and perhaps I should convince myself that Pumkin finds my presence comforting. But, I have a sneaking suspicion that my child has inherited my passion for annoying those we love. He or she is in there just giggling away, I’m sure of it.

But Pumkin could not hide from the camera. Oh, s/he tried; snuggled down behind Moonshot’s pelvic bone in an attempt to distort the ultrasound. If s/he could have made a funny face, I’m sure s/he would have. But thanks to the skill of our ultrasound technician, Pumkin was unable to escape the indignity of being photographed. Sorry kid, parents need to show off their children…and until you’re willing to show up in person for our bragging…you’ll have to accept an occasional sonic intrusion.

I was stunned to see how much the ultrasound made sense when you’re right there. I’ve been subjected to countless ultrasound pictures from excited parents. Blurry, abstract shapes they swear display the form of a child. Rather than upset them, I usually just smile and tell them how amazing the picture is. However, when you’re watching the process, it’s crystal clear. Watching the images change in real time as the technician moved the wand and the baby moves, you get a sense of the shape of the baby in three dimensions. You stand there in the small, darkened room, face to face with the reality of a baby. Then the technician freezes the image and it suddenly becomes slightly more difficult to see what you’re looking at. Then she prints the image and it becomes even harder to see. For the parents, we can remember the original experience and can find the pictures in the blur with no problem. But most of the images are incomprehensible without guidance. So, of the seven pictures Moonshot and I left with, only two are clear enough to be worth scanning and passing around to friends and family. And even with these two, I have a sense that half my friends are just smiling and telling me how amazing the picture is rather than upset me.

The first is a profile image. Pretty clearly a child, if you ask me. My Mom tells me Pumkin looks like me. I hope she’s kidding.

The second is a bit more of a challenge to see, but it’s my favorite. Head is the lower right corner, facing up and away. Knee is tucked up almost touching the elbow. And the thumb is firmly planted in Pumkin’s mouth. That’s crazy to me for some reason. There’s a real baby in there...moving and dancing, and sucking its thumb! I can’t wait to see that person.